Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Time will tell...

A really great friend said it best, "no matter how you try to guard yourself you want to give your parent the benefit of the doubt and deep inside the hope and expectation is alive and well and full and when it is crushed and damaged it hurts".

I feel let down. I set myself up for the possibility of it, but now that it's happened I am crushed nonetheless. I hate feeling like you lied. I hate feeling like I can't trust you. But my wall is up. And as much as you have chipped away at the very foundation of it and are slowly taking those stones down, just know that you will never have the satisfaction of me being 100% open to you and trusting of you. Unfortunately for you- 28 years of not being a father is working against you. For someone that is wanting to prove me wrong, you are not doing a good job.

2 comments:

  1. My heart truly goes out to you gurl. I would never wish the feelings you are experiencing right now on anyone. I am thankful you have a wonder family of friends and loved ones that are worthy of your trust and embrace the light, spirit, and joy you bring to thier lives. Please know I am always a shoulder, ear, or smile when you find yourself in need! On to the bigger, better, and bright Ah La Poo Butt!

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